Life allows us to gather, achieve, win, and receive.
But if the hand is always closing around something, it eventually forgets how to open.
Taking may fill the hand.
Giving helps fill the person.
Until I discovered the value of life’s GIVE and TAKE system, I remained in a state of missing something I could not quite identify.
We all possess a built-in drive to go out there and win, gather, claim, achieve, and obtain our wants and needs.
Some people never stop.
MY FELLOW RATS?
LOL.
The journey becomes even more exciting when we see others doing the same thing.
They increase their effort.
We notice and increase ours.
They see us accelerating and speed up again.
Now we have what is commonly called the rat race.
The system encouraging us to get ahead exists for a reason.
Just do not lose your head while trying to get ahead.
BALANCE
What helps the whole process make sense?
What allows us to remain closer to human than rat while running the race?
The GIVE dynamic balances the TAKE.
Without giving, receiving becomes misaligned.
We begin operating off-center—at a tilt within and outside ourselves.
Taking says:
“I need.”
“I want.”
“I earned.”
“I found.”
“I achieved.”
Giving adds:
“I have enough to share.”
“You matter too.”
“Your turn can bring me joy.”
Balance does not require refusing success.
It prevents success from shrinking the person enjoying it.
WINNING ALL THE TIME?
Hmm.
Predatory behavior has functions in survival, competition, and protecting what matters.
But remaining in that mode too long can cause a person to lose the very nature needed to enjoy what was obtained.
You may become an excellent provider, gatherer, competitor, and player.
At what cost?
I am not talking only about money.
The self is at stake—the earthly person and the heavenly spirit.
If every interaction becomes a contest, every person becomes either a rival, tool, obstacle, or prize.
Where did the human being go?
WORTHY NOTE: Letting go of something allows the hand to grasp the next goodie.
HIDDEN VALUE
Being first in line feels good.
Finding the great deal feels good.
Good fortune and plain old luck feel good.
But consider this:
The other fellow wants an opportunity too.
What is wrong with occasionally making sure another person goes home with the goods?
You have had yours.
Allow someone else to step forward.
That act contains rewards extending beyond the visible process—but they are revealed only through practice.
Talking ain’t doing.
You cannot experience the hidden reward of generosity while merely discussing how generous people should be.
THE DREAM JACKET
I once bought a beautiful, expensive, one-of-a-kind jacket in another state.
Everywhere I wore it, people complimented it.
It looked good.
It felt good.
And I became attached to it for many reasons.
One day, I left it behind in a restaurant.
I called the next day.
No one had seen it.
No one had reported it.
I continued checking, but the jacket did not return.
Its loss disturbed me.
LET IT GO
Eventually, I considered the jacket from another point of view.
Someone else found it.
They recognized its beauty and considered it their good fortune.
Now they could enjoy this wonderful jacket.
I had my time with it.
Perhaps it was their turn.
I let it go—and strangely, I felt good.
Strange but true.
Such is life, if you choose.
Letting go did not make taking the jacket right.
It prevented the loss from continuing to take peace from me.
PAUSE FOR CAUSE.
Sometimes you lose the object once—and then lose it repeatedly through resentment.
GAIN AND LOSS
When I find money, I rejoice.
When I lose money, I panic.
But I would do well to remember that gain and loss continue making the rounds.
Perhaps going with the flow is worth examining.
Without some acceptance, repeated loss can eventually produce bitterness and unrest.
After all, so much of what we possess is on loan.
Yes?
A retired friend carried $800 in an envelope so he could pay cash while out and about.
The envelope fell from his pocket—into someone else’s.
LOL.
His loss became another person’s astonishing afternoon.
VALUING ANOTHER PERSON’S TURN
When someone else prospers, I am happy for them.
WHY?
It is their turn.
Let it be so.
Their turn is no less legitimate than mine.
I have had turns.
I expect to have more.
Meanwhile, I can practice another form of happiness:
The joy of watching someone else do well.
Do not underestimate that experience.
At times, it is priceless.
Envy says another person’s success subtracts from you.
Generosity recognizes that their joy can become something you share without taking anything they earned.
THE GIVING GENE REWARDS
You can give time, money, goods, attention, encouragement, knowledge, service, and opportunity—just as you can receive them.
But giving can deliver an enjoyment unlike possessing.
I notice this when I barbecue or bake.
I enjoy watching people enjoy what I enjoy.
I make sure they have plenty.
Seeing their satisfaction becomes part of mine.
That remains priceless and joyful to me.
ROD SERLING’S TWILIGHT ZONE
A Twilight Zone episode tells of a man who dies and awakens in a place where he can have anything he wants.
At first, he is busy, excited, and convinced he has reached heaven.
He always wins.
He never loses.
Pleasure remains constantly available.
After a while, endless winning becomes ordinary.
There is no challenge.
No contrast.
No closure.
No satisfaction.
The “gimme” and “got it” gene receives everything and enjoys less and less.
HEAVEN OR HELL?
The man becomes miserable and asks to leave heaven for the other place.
Then he learns the truth:
This is the other place.
Whoa.
A life containing only taking, winning, and getting eventually loses the contrast required for appreciation.
If nothing can be lost, little feels precious.
If nothing must be shared, nobody else truly matters.
PEARLS INSIGHT
Giving and receiving are not enemies.
They are partners.
Receiving allows life to reach you.
Giving allows life to continue through you.
The problem is not having.
The problem begins when having can no longer open its hand.
RICHIE SPEAKS
Take your turn.
Enjoy it.
Work hard.
Receive the compliment.
Buy the jacket.
Find the bargain.
Win the prize.
Then remember that another person is waiting for a turn too.
Your success does not become smaller because you helped somebody else succeed.
FINAL THOUGHT
Life moves through arrival and departure, possession and release, winning and losing, receiving and giving.
We do not control every exchange.
But we can decide whether each exchange enlarges or shrinks us.
FINAL SAY
Without the give-and-take balance, life remains out of whack, off-center, and short on joy.
That is my take—
on what gives.
— Richie
Pearls for the Soul
when you feed the soul, you feed everything.
https://pearlsforthesoul.com
Been expecting you