The moment love becomes selfish gain… something sacred quietly leaves the room.
Love and use.
A dangerous combination—
depending on the motive behind it.
We use things every day.
Cars.
Phones.
Tools.
Homes.
No problem there.
But when the subject becomes PEOPLE—
everything changes.
USING PEOPLE
Governments use people.
Companies use people.
Groups use people.
Men and women use each other.
Sometimes mutually.
Sometimes selfishly.
Sometimes lovingly.
Sometimes destructively.
And that is where the problem begins.
WORTHY NOTE
Mutual exchange is natural. Exploitation is not.
THE HUMAN SIDE
People are not objects.
They are emotional.
Spiritual.
Mental.
Physical.
Psychological beings.
Complex.
Sensitive.
Layered.
Different.
No two alike.
Which means the “using” of another person—
always leaves an effect behind.
GOOD OR BAD.
THE QUESTION
Can you love someone—
and use them too?
Pause for cause here.
Because many relationships quietly run on transactions.
“If I do this… I get that.”
“If I provide this… I receive affection.”
“If I give gifts… I gain access.”
At first glance this appears normal.
But over time—
the soul starts asking questions.
Am I loved…
or merely useful?
SUBJECTIVITY
There are thin lines between:
Mutuality
Selfishness
Manipulation
Dependence
Abuse
Neediness
Control
And not everyone recognizes when those lines get crossed.
One person may feel appreciated.
The other—
drained.
One may feel loved.
The other—
used.
THE SILENT PERSON
Sometimes people allow themselves to be used—
because they fear rejection.
Or conflict.
Or loneliness.
So they remain quiet.
But silence is not agreement.
And eventually—
the heart keeps score.
WORTHY NOTE
What is tolerated today may become resentment tomorrow.
NATURE SHOWS US SOMETHING
We love forests.
Oceans.
Mountains.
Wildlife.
And we use them too.
But wise people leave no destruction behind.
The experienced camper leaves the campsite pristine—
for the next visitor.
That is respect.
Perhaps relationships should operate similarly.
INTERPERSONAL LIFE
When people come together—
courtesy matters.
Sensitivity matters.
Awareness matters.
Because people are not machines.
They tire.
Hurt.
Need reassurance.
Need appreciation.
And when appreciation disappears—
using becomes more obvious.
MARRIAGE & LOVE
This is where many people struggle.
Marriage does not grant ownership.
Love was never meant to become entitlement.
Flowers given only to gain something back—
miss the deeper point.
Real love matures.
Eventually it says:
“I appreciate you simply because you exist.”
No hidden motive.
No angle.
No transaction.
Just care.
Pure.
WORTHY NOTE
The highest form of love gives because it wants to—not because it must profit.
THE REAL TEST
If the benefit disappeared tomorrow—
would the love remain?
That answer tells the true story.
Because love for love’s sake—
is rare.
But when found—
it nourishes both souls.
And that type of love…
does not leave destruction behind.
— Richie
Pearls for the Soul
when you feed the soul, you feed everything.
https://pearlsforthesoul.com
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