You may not notice when seriousness starts taking over.
First the smile disappears.
Then the fun.
Then one day you realize you have become very efficient at living…
and not very good at enjoying it.
You do not always sense it when it begins.
You may not feel it.
You may not even suspect it.
Then one day…
something around the mouth feels tight.
The jaw stays clenched.
The smile does not come as easily.
Things that used to amuse you do not.
Life starts feeling MUNDANE.
Your movements become mechanical.
Routine.
Predictable.
And to compensate, we retreat into the mind.
That is where the trouble can really get comfortable.
THE MIND BAILS YOU OUT…YOU THINK?
The mind is very good at explaining everything.
LOL.
You become serious because you are:
BUSY.
RESPONSIBLE.
ON A MISSION.
GETTING THINGS DONE.
So the ego says:
“This is justified.”
“Fun can wait.”
“Joy can wait.”
“Relaxation can wait.”
“When I am finished, I will change.”
No, you probably will not.
Because life has a funny way of replacing one finished mission with another one.
Then another.
Then another.
Pretty soon, you have made seriousness into a lifestyle.
BE WARY OF PROGRAMMED RESPONSES
Whatever we practice, we get better at.
That includes being tense.
Detached.
Unmoved.
Impatient.
Overly serious.
You can actually train yourself into a fixed emotional position.
And once that behavior settles in, it wants feeding.
More pressure.
More urgency.
More reasons not to relax.
More justification.
Meanwhile, your real self is sitting somewhere in the background wondering when it gets a turn.
That is the tragedy.
You may be accomplishing plenty…
while starving the very part of you that was supposed to enjoy the accomplishment.
STOP ME PLEASE, SAYS THE HEART
If some people are not interrupted in this process, something begins to harden.
Humor passes by.
Kindness passes by.
Simple joy passes by.
Playfulness passes by.
Not because those things disappeared.
Because the person stopped responding to them.
The face can become almost fixed.
The body itself starts reflecting the inner condition.
And then somebody says:
“Smile!”
LOL.
Now it feels like exercise.
That should tell you something.
TAKE STOCK IN YOURSELF
Balance is the key.
If you have made it this far in life, then clearly you have handled quite a few things already.
Problems.
Responsibilities.
Deadlines.
Losses.
Work.
Bills.
Decisions.
You survived them.
You managed.
So maybe you do not have to grip the steering wheel quite so hard.
LOL.
And if you are just beginning your adult journey, here is something worth knowing:
There is time.
There is opportunity.
There are things waiting for you.
There are portions of life you have not even discovered yet.
Do not turn the whole journey into one long assignment.
Enjoy looking.
Enjoy finding.
Relax, will you?
TEST YOUR SITUATION RIGHT NOW
Here is a simple test.
Right now…
as you are reading this…
SMILE.
Not later.
Now.
Go ahead.
LOL.
How did it feel?
Natural?
Easy?
Effortless?
Awkward?
Forced?
Strange?
Interesting, isn’t it?
If smiling feels completely natural, good.
Those muscles have been getting regular exercise.
If it feels unfamiliar…
that may be worth noticing.
The body keeps score of what we practice.
HERE IS THE TEST CUTTING THE OTHER WAY
Now think about seriousness.
When you actually NEED to be serious…
does it feel unnatural?
Does it require effort?
GOOD.
That may mean seriousness is not your permanent state.
It is simply a tool you use when required.
That is where it belongs.
Seriousness has a place.
Emergencies.
Important decisions.
Danger.
Major responsibilities.
Fine.
But it does not need to move into the spare bedroom and live with you forever.
LOL.
RICHIE SPEAKS
Here is one Richie rule:
Do not confuse a serious face with a serious purpose.
You can care deeply…
and still smile.
Another:
If your mission requires you to stop being human until it is finished…
you may want to inspect the mission.
And one more:
You do not have to look miserable to prove you are responsible.
LOL.
JOY IS NOT A DISTRACTION
This is worth adding.
Joy does not interfere with life.
It is part of life.
Humor does not make you less capable.
Playfulness does not make you immature.
Relaxation does not make you lazy.
Sometimes these things are exactly what keep the machine running correctly.
A person who can laugh can recover faster.
A person who can pause can think clearer.
A person who can smile can connect better.
That is not weakness.
That is balance.
PEARLS INSIGHT
Chronic seriousness can become a learned emotional habit.
When pressure, routine, and responsibility dominate too long, people may lose touch with humor, playfulness, connection, and simple enjoyment.
Balance means being serious when the moment requires it…
without making seriousness your permanent identity.
PEARLS CONNECTION
This connects directly with THE SIMPLICITY OF IT ALL and WHAT’S THE HURRY? RELAX, WILL YOU.
Those Pearls remind us to pause.
This one asks another question:
What good is creating time and space…
if you never let yourself enjoy either one?
It also connects with YOU GOT MY FULL ATTENTION.
You can be present.
Focused.
Caring.
And fully engaged…
without becoming grim.
FINAL THOUGHT
You can give somebody your full attention without becoming serious.
You can do excellent work without wearing tension on your face.
You can be responsible and still laugh.
You can have goals and still enjoy lunch.
LOL.
Life is not impressed by how tightly you hold it.
So take the test again.
Smile.
Right now.
If it comes naturally…
keep up the good work.
If it does not…
maybe that smile needs a little exercise.
And please refer to my picture.
I am smiling at you right now.
Enjoy.
— Richie
Pearls for the Soul
when you feed the soul, you feed everything.
https://pearlsforthesoul.com
Been expecting you